Getting irritated with myself lately. Whenever i have a bad workout i really pound it on myself. I make excuse to why i feel this way but in the end it is not the excuse it just my lack of motivation to workout. I’ve been at 159 pounds for nearly a month now, and the pounds doesn’t seem to drop. Losing patience and losing motivation is the worse feeling ever…

I am a man of many sins. I grew up believing that going to church would make my parents happy and I still do to this day. I don’t have faith but rather determination and my own willpower to overcome my struggles. I don’t go to mass as a practice but rather an activity to satisfied my family. I will continue to sin until I find my own path to god. 

Recently, I’ve been volunteering at church to help my friend teach young kids about the teaching of god. I also joined a catholic confirmation group in downtown Seattle. But my first day of class felt awkward. I was surrounded by religious adults. I felt like I didn’t belong in the confirmation group. I didn’t join on my own will but on my parents behave because I know this would make them happy. I hope to have more belief by the time this class is over. I just never been that type of person that believes in an almighty person and it just so hard for me to start believing in it now. Just something on my mind lately. 

For some odd reason I really want to get Corgi… I think it is because a friend linked a tumblr filled with Corgi the other day and I clicked it…. and I was overwhelmed. 

5 Weeks into Fall quarter and I have yet done any homework. No motivation to go to school whatsoever. And for some odd reason all my classes test are online, it is really hard not to google some of the answer. Why can’t i just drop out and live in the forest like a hermit….

Mom

I love my mom. She is the best mom i could ever asked for.  I love getting my  hair cut by my mom. She is probably the only person in the whole world that has ever cut my hair. To me, she is the best mom barber. She always tell me to go get one done at the barber because they do a better job but I always say no. Not because it cost money but it just feels a lot better getting my hair cut by my mom. Everyone ask me “where do you get your hair cut “, My answer has always been “My mom” and I’m proud of it. Sometimes she mess up and I get mad but I always end up coming back to her asking for a haircut.  I love my mom and the haircut she gives me. <3

My Meal Plan for the next 5 weeks.

This is my final meal adjustment for my final week of cutting. I will of course add in and remove food every 1-2 weeks just to mix things up but overall the amount of carbs, protein, fat and calorie consumption will be the same! 

My day starts at 7 AM, with an empty stomach and doing an hour long carido, consisting of walking incline, stairs, jump ropes, running, or jogging. Then around 3 PM I hit the gym and do weight training for about 2 hours then I do an 30 minute carido to wrap things up! I go to bed at around 10 ish or 11 ish. I’m getting near single digits fat percentage so I have to really watch the amount of carbs im taking in. Normally I want around 50-100 Grams of crabs per day. Workout days I will most likely hit 120 then burn about 50 grams. 

Breakfast(9:00AM)

1 whole egg

2 Egg white

1/4 Cup of Oatmeal

0.35 Cup of Cottage Cheese

Calorie:264 Carbs:20G Fat:11G Protein:25G

 

Lunch(12:00PM)

1 Can of Tuna/ OR 4 oz chicken breast

Whole wheat pasta(1/2 Cup)

Calorie:196 Carbs:21G Fat:2G Protein: 46G

 

Pre-workout(3:00PM)

Protein Shake 1 scoop

1 Medium Banana

Calorie:245 Carbs:27G Fat:3G Protein: 28G

 

Post-workout:

Protein Shake 1.5 Scoop

Calorie:196 Carbs:5 Fat:2G Protein: 46G

 

Dinner(7:00PM)

Flank steak/Chicken breast 4 oz/1 Canned Tuna

Brown Rice (1/2) cup/  or vegetables/ Or whole wheat pasta

Calorie:279Carbs:23G Fat:10G Protein: 20G

 

Snack 1 (9:30PM)

Natural Creamy Peanut butter

Half an Apple.

Calorie:228 Carbs: 16G Fat:16G Protein: 7G

 

Total:

Calorie: 1408

Carbs: 112G

Fat: 44G

Protein: 172G

Sometimes I take the cottage cheese out for breakfast. Some days I would replace the eggs with a protein shake. My dinner, lunch will most likely be some sort of fish, chicken/seak (4 oz). I prefer fish because it is rich in protein, low in carb and fat. By week 3 I will most likely remove about 30-40G of carbs. Kind of glad this is my final adjustment to my meal plan for my past 5 weeks.

Seeing my cousins and brother graduate last weekend was somewhat a wake up call for me. Time is constantly moving and it stops for NO ONE. It feels like just yesterday that I attended my brother high school graduation. I don’t know but I don’t really like how fast time is moving. I regret saying “I want to grow up already”, because i simply want to stay as a kid forever. I want to be able to watch Arthur rafter school, the magic school bus, nap during school, and run around and play outside without no doubts, worries, or care for anything. 

I really admire those who have their career, future plan all planned out. It’s always great to know what exactly you want in life and what you expect in life. People who have goals and dreams are the ones living their life to fullest potential and that is something I admired. If you’re that type of person continue your journey and it will be rewarding at the end. Don’t let anyone tell you can’t do something and  don’t let anyone or anything stop you from succeeding your goals and dream. In the end, your success will be the best revenge on those who tried to stop you, those had doubts and those who didn’t believe in your success. Never doubt yourself because you’re the only person that can turn your dreams into a reality. Hail successful people =)!

Unfair!

College is boring. No interesting people, no exciting people, beside some of the international students that attends the college. I love their accents especially, I find it very charming. I also like interacting with them and asking them about their country. But I feel bad for them since they are paying about 4x times more for tuition. I usually go to the gym after my classes are over and this one time a Chinese girl approached me asking where the student store was. Oh, by the way she had really nice eyes, she was also really pretty. But anyways back to the story! So I showed her the way to the student store and I ended up helping her find her classes books. At first glance I already had a feeling that she was a new international student due to her accent and her English was that well but our commutation was actually pretty good. She showed me her class schedule which consisted of the books she needed for those classes, and the tuition cost for the classes.  One ESL class costed about 1,000 US dollars and she was taking 4 classes. I felt really bad because I’m only paying 400-500 US dollars for 5 credits which is like a class. This is also a Community college was tuition is a little less than University. I asked her if she plans on attending a University and she stated that she wanted to go to Seattle University where she will major in some of science program. It usually takes two years to actually transfer to a university If you take 15 credits per quarter which is about 3 class. She will probably have to pay about 12,000 USA for 4 quarters for two year which is about 24,000 US dollars at A community college. It is sad for them to pay that much compared to US citizen but i could see why. My friend once told me that international students “are either rich or poor”. She told me her name but It was really hard to remember and pronounce and I’m bad with names so I can’t even remember her name as I’m writing this. But then I just left to go work out. I see her now and then at the school, a wave there and chitchat there. But Kind of feel sorry for her paying so much for school.

Today!

“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.” - Dr Seuss

Vietnam!

Knowing where you came from has always been an important aspect in my family. I moved to America when I was 5 years old, and since then I’ve have never visited Vietnam ever since. My parents would always ask me “Would you like to back to Vietnam and visit?”. My reply was always silent. I have tons of family still living in Vietnam, the majority of them were there when I was born. They raised me, cared for me for the first five years of my life. My repayment for them was forgetting them. I can’t even remember a single family member name, nor their face. I can’t even remember the dog I had. I can barely speak my language, and communicating with my parents can sometimes be a challenge but I guess over the past few years they became more fluent with English so our commutation has gotten better. 

My little sister whom was born here in America knows better Vietnamese than I do. She can even speak it better and she even went back to Vietnam to visit in 2009. Isn’t that shameful? I can’t even write or read in Vietnamese. But everything comes down to me not having enough pride in my own country. My name is the only real pride I really have of my country. When my family became a citizen, I had the choice to change my first name (Kiet) to whatever I wanted. But I guess in the end it stayed the same because it is a name that I lived with all my life. I feel shameful sometimes. I feel disappointed in myself  and most importantly I feel unattached from my culture and the place where I came from. But you gotta start somewhere right? and this is the time I start taking pride into my country. I plan on visiting Vietnam the summer of 2013 and that is official. I will learn every single aspect of Vietnamese. I don’t want to be that one person in my family that forgot where they came from. 

Excited!

Even though winter QTR is almost over ( still gotta do my research paper =( ), I’m kind excited for spring QTR. Because that’s when i get my CAR.

Home wreckers…

            We live our life’s without realizing the importance of our surroundings. Every mistakes we made in our life end up affecting or even changing our surroundings. By surroundings I mean society, friends, families, and even strangers. Think about it. Mistakes are of course inevitable but I just don’t get why people choose to make that mistake even though they know the impact/ consequence they will cause. Why dive into a prefect relationship and try to ruin the bonding, love, and trust they worked so hard to develop? Have respect for people relationships, don’t ruin their relationship because of your selflessness emotions and desires to be with that person. Think of the consequence before you act based on your own desires. SMH homewreckers.